The Bible tells us that "marriage is honorable." This is certainly true. In fact, despite disturbing divorce rates and increases in co-habitation among nonmarried couples, marriage is still pretty popular. It is so popular that EVERYONE wants to participate in it. And at a price tag of over $35,000 on average, weddings are still big business despite runaway deficits.
 
There is no dearth of opinions concerning marriage these days. Just turn on the TV, listen to the radio, or read the newspaper. The debate over what marriage is and who can participate in it has reached a fever pitch. What's interesting is very little is being said about what the creator of marriage thinks. How would God define marriage? A quick review of Genesis 2 and 3 would clear up any confusion about God's definition of and intentions for marriage.
 
But this article is not so much about how marriage should be defined as much as it is about why there is even a debate over the meaning of marriage in the first place. How did we get to the place of having to restore the integrity of God's first (and I would argue God's most important) institution? What role has the church played in the current distortion of marriage in our society?
 
It's Time to Lead
 
Sadly, the church in America has gradually settled into the role of responder rather than leader. In the name of "tolerance," we have abdicated our responsibility as light bearers and have allowed our spiritual eyes to dilate and adjust to the dark alcoves of moral neutrality. The fact that the divorce rate among Christians is no different than non-Christians might suggest that marriage has no more meaning to God's people than it does to pagans.
 
It is time to lead! Biblical Marriage InstituteSM was founded, in part, for the purpose of raising up leaders in the church who will join us in elevating biblical marriage while bringing down divorce. We are targeting Christian couples, based on the biblical principle which asserts that "judgment" or purification must first take place within the "household of God" (1 Peter 4:17). As God's people, we must demonstrate to the world that a consistent application of biblical truth within the marriage context, along with accountability and support, will lead to a lifetime of love and oneness.
 
Recently, I listened to a sermon by John Piper entitled, "God's Pursuit of Racial Harmony and Diversity at Infinite Cost." While the message was on the topic of race relations and the involvement or lack of involvement of the church, it struck a chord with me in a way that went beyond the issue of racism. As Piper read an excerpt from Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "Letter from a Birmingham Jail," I was reminded of the silence of the church today when it comes to standing up for something else that is important to God - biblical marriage.
 
Read the excerpt of King's letter below and as you read, keep in mind that Dr. King's original intent was to draw the church's attention to its apathetic response to racism. I believe you would agree with me that, with slight modifications, these words would easily apply to the church of the 21st century in the context of marriage. Here are King's words: 

"So I have not said to my people: 'Get rid of your discontent.' Rather, I have tried to say that this normal and healthy discontent can be channeled into the creative outlet of nonviolent direct action. And now this approach is being termed extremist. But though I was initially disappointed at being categorized as an extremist, as I continued to think about the matter I gradually gained a measure of satisfaction from the label.
 
Was not Jesus an extremist for love: 'Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.'
 
Was not Amos an extremist for justice: 'Let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like an ever flowing stream.'
 
Was not Paul an extremist for the Christian gospel: 'I bear in my body the marks of the Lord Jesus.'
 
Was not Martin Luther an extremist: 'Here I stand; I cannot do otherwise, so help me God.'
 
And John Bunyan: 'I will stay in jail to the end of my days before I make a butchery of my conscience.'
 
And Abraham Lincoln: 'This nation cannot survive half slave and half free.'
 
And Thomas Jefferson: 'We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal . . .'
 
So the question is not whether we will be extremists, but what kind of extremists we will be. Will we be extremists for hate or for love? Will we be extremists for the preservation of injustice or for the extension of justice?
 
In that dramatic scene on Calvary's hill three men were crucified. We must never forget that all three were crucified for the same crime--the crime of extremism. Two were extremists for immorality, and thus fell below their environment. The other, Jesus Christ, was an extremist for love, truth and goodness, and thereby rose above his environment. Perhaps the South, the nation and the world are in dire need of creative extremists."
 
"Creative extremists."  Hmm... kind of catchy.  We must never forget that God created marriage and His way is the ONLY way.  We - the church - are God's voice, His hands, His feet.  It's time to lead.  We can change the divorce statistics one couple at a time by modeling marriage God's way. 

Alonza Jones is the President of Biblical Marriage Institute, whose primary focus is mentoring Christian couples in the principles of biblical marriage.

"Cultural Trends Related to Marriage"